Weird. Naisip ko na naman ito while I’m taking a midnight bath.

Okay. Flashback. Six years ago or so. T’was summer and gaya ng nakasanayan, we’re on a private resort with the Reyes clan. The sunshine was great… beaming its ray of light on the pool, para bang nag-aanyaya. Well… as a kid ano pa ba’ng magagawa mo? Eh di swim na! Haha… what a great feeling.

“A great feeling?!” hah! Yeah right! ‘pag nasa pambata kang pool! Hmn… I’m challenged, so I transferred to the adults’ side. There’s no one in there… I’m alone!!! Perfect. I try to swim at the corner, reaching for the pool’s side and stepping my foot on its “stairs” for safety. Nang mapagod na ‘ko, I was feeling the “stairs” while holding my breath underwater, but unfortunately… hindi ko maabot. I suddenly realized, nalulunod na ‘ko. I call for help, but no one came. I saw my brother and my guy cousin, but they’re just staring at me blankly. I give up and let myself be eaten by the killer pool.

Balik na tayo sa present.

Then what happened? I don’t know exactly who saved me from drowning… si tita siguro… pero ang alam ko lang, pagkaligtas sa’kin, I cried so hard maybe because of headache or fear or happiness or whatever. That experience serves both as a nightmare and a lesson that should be remembered.

So, what’s the deal? What if I’m nearly drowned? What if I’m safe now? Well… wala naman. Naaalala ko lang kasi ‘yung Saint Jude. Para kasing nalunod na naman ako?! Not literally huh? Naaalala ko lang lahat ng nangyari sa’kin do’n dati… T’was as if Saint Jude was the killer pool and I’m the same kid that was trying to swim for my precious life.

Complicated? I will use tagalog words para mas feel… okay?

Simple lang naman eh! Marami na rin akong pinagdaanan sa SJA for almost 9 years. ‘yung sakit dahil sa sirang pangalan, sirang reputasyon, atbp., mahirap talagang tiisin. Pero pinilit kong lumangoy paitaas… pinilit makasagap ng kaunting hangin… pinilit humingi ng saklolo. Sa lahat ng pasakit na naranasan ko, natutunan ko kung pa’no lumaban, kung pa’no magsikap maabot ang nais maabot, at kung pa’no pahalagahan ang mga bagay na nagdulot sa’kin ng takot at galit. Hindi naman kasi ako makakapag-move-on kung hindi ko alam kung pa’no tanggapin ang mga bagay na nangyari na. That’s how the world revolves, wala na tayong magagawa pa.


Too short? Yeah… if you’re going to absorb what I’m implying.
Too long? Yeah… if you think that this is one of my crappy-doos in life.

posted by Gi @ 12:25 PM